Father and son

Today was a wonderful day. I had the privilege of spending a few hours with my dad. There’s something unique about what God has created within the relationship between a father and a son. Words can’t adequately describe it. It’s something that has to be experienced. The perfect depiction of this relationship can only be seen between God the Father and Jesus the Son. And the older I get, especially now that I’m a dad, the more I appreciate the uniqueness of this father to son relationship. Today was one of those days where dad and I talked about anything under the sun. I’m so very thankful that we can talk. I’m even more grateful that my dad takes time to listen. Now that I am older, I can see my dad not only as a respected father, but also as a fellow man and friend. Thanks Pops for being such a genuine father and friend. Thanks for all of the sacrifices you’ve made over the years for me. Thank you, Lord, for the uniqueness of this father to son relationship. And may the Zapp tradition continue with my son, Joseph.

Amen.

Me & Pops

Samantha & Sydney

The 17th of this month is my daughters’ 5th birthday. Unfortunately, it also marks the 5th anniversary of their deaths. My identical twin daughters, Samantha and Sydney, were born still 2/17/2004. I’m not going to get into all the details as to what happened. If you want to read more, please visit my wife’s blog here.

At the prompting of my wife, I sat down and wrote them a letter last night. Initially I was a little resistant to writing the letter, but I did it any way, wanting to please my wife. Maybe my initial reluctance was a result of not dealing with some emotional baggage from the loss. Regardless, I’m glad I wrote the letter because it was a big step in emotional healing, and more importantly, it forced me to reflect on my own mortality; that the death statistic still remains 1 out of every 1 person will die. Don’t miss understand me. I’m not being flippant about death or dying, nor am I rationalizing my daughters’ deaths. Many times it takes a life-changing event to force us to face the stark realities in our lives. Am I afraid of dying? Well, I’m actually more afraid of how I’m going to die! Aren’t you? But, no, I’m not afraid of dying. The Lord Jesus himself tells us in the Gospel of John:

“Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. And where I go you know, and the way you know.” (John 14:1-4, New King James Version)

My pastor read this passage at our daughters’ funeral. Every time I read it, I am reminded of the promise of someday being welcomed into heaven by my two precious girls, whom I’ve never had the pleasure of knowing.

Thank you, Jesus. For without you and your sacrifice on the cross, there would be no hope in this world.

Samantha & Sydney – We love you both very much!! Happy Birthday.

Dad

Cabin Fever

Oh, it's been a long time since my last post! I've been stuck in the daily grind for months now & the time has just slipped away. Here we are right smack dab in the middle of winter and I am trying to shake a little cabin fever. I've eased back into PT (physical training) and trying to shed some of those holiday pounds. Today, my son and I were breaking up huge chunks of ice from our driveway. The exercise felt great. What really motivated me was watching Joey clear away the ice so his sister could ride her bicycle. That was priceless! I'm sure if you live up here in the northern parts of the U.S., you too are looking forward to the more temperate weather of springtime. Me too.

I'll see you around here a little more often. /Jeff

Joey the workin' man posing for the camera

Getting er done!